I still have been feeling great. That's a big plus. I feel as though I am getting on the right track. I'm starting to feel again. Normally I push my emotions aside and harm myself. My skin looks great! I have picked of course, I'm not going to lie, but the last couple of weeks it has been to a minimum. I'm having trouble with dieting, or better eating lifestyle. I just can't seem to loose the weight. I lose a couple of pounds, then gain it right back.

I had a great holiday! I got in alot of beach time. I look like a lobster, and yes, I did have sunblock on, 30! I am going to be so dark. It's amazing that this much sun is condered unhealthy, but yet when you have a tan you look so much healthier.

We did spend way too much money over the holiday. This scares the shit out of me. It's so expensive to go to the shore. I wound up blowing my whole pay check without really splurging on anything. We went out to breakfast one morning that was it. We barbequed all weekend, and snacked at the house. Where does money go? Sometimes I think it just disappears.

Z was a bit pissy when I came home from work today. He too, got way too much sun. Z was taking out his frustrations out on me when I got home. Just being snippy and very short. He said my brother was getting on his nerves today very badly. My brother is very hard to live with, he just doesn't give a fuck about anything, not even himself. I love him, but sometimes my brother just depresses people. He's very arguementive(sp? someone please correct it!), even when he is wrong, he still will swear he is right. He never makes anyone feel wanted, he pushes people away all the time and then gets mad when you don't want to speak with him. Z handles it all very well, but the whole situation is sad.

We need to get out. I'm trying so hard! So after you get done reading this entry, keep me in mind please, and wish me the best. Maybe the power of thought can help me out. I need all the help I can get. Hahahah silly thoughts.

I'm still smiling :)